All you can drink for three hours? Now if that’s not how Chicagoans celebrate Black Wednesday I don’t know what is. It’s happening at Bar Umbriago. For $40, guests will enjoy unlimited drinks starting at 9pm and ending at midnight, and a live DJ until closing time. The only drinks this special will not include are shots, which means all of Bar Umbriago’s signature cocktails and house-infused vodkas are up for grabs. Bar Umbriago, 6 West Hubbard, (312)494-1200, 9pm-12am, $40.
Where, oh where will all the freaks go this Thanksgiving Eve? To the rowdiest, most debaucherous, finger-licking dance party in Chicago, provided by none other than the Porn and Chicken crew. DJs Richie
August, Orville Kline, Alinka, X-Realmz and host Dom Brown are taking over Beauty Bar, and it’s going to get very greasy. Join in the obscenities, $3 PBR tall boys, and $4 Fire Ball whiskey shots. Your relatives will all wonder what that sly smirk is about. Beauty Bar, 1444 West Chicago, (312)226-8828, 9pm-2am, no cover, 21+.
Even with Turkey and fixings several hours away, it’ll be wise to fill your belly with something to soak up all that booze. The good folks at Burger Joint know this and will be delivering late till 1am and staying open till 5am. And just like you’re going to be a hot mess and probably hungover, Burger Joint has two burgers named appropriately for you: The Hot Mess Burger (a handcrafted patty with chili, onions and Merkts cheddar) and The Hangover (a handcrafted patty with bacon, a fried egg, tomato and American cheese), both $6.99. Burger Joint, 675 North Franklin, (312)440-8600, burgerjointchicago.com, 11am-5am.
Division Ale House
At the Ale House on Division, indulge in all-day “black” drink deals, including $3 Black Bushmills shots, $5 Crown and Coke cocktails, $5 Guinness Stout pints, and $5 Malibu “black” and stormy cocktails. Their kitchen will stay open till midnight, and feature several “black” snack items, such as $7.99 Black and Tan Mac and Cheese (rotini pasta, creamy Cheddar cheese sauce, Harp Irish Lager, Guinness stout). DJ Storm kicks off his set at 9. Division Ale House, 1942 West Division. (773)384-6886, 4pm-2am.
Freddie Le Grand at MID
We love Black Wednesday because it’s one of the few times the hump day becomes TGIW! The biggest dance party is going down at MID, featuring the world-famous Dutch house DJ Freddie Le Grand. Le Grand is most known for number-one club banger, “Put Your Hands Up for Detroit.” Also appearing is New York DJ dBerrie and Chicago’s own DJ Nathan Scott. MID, 306 North Halsted, (312)265-3990, 10pm-4am, $30, 21+.
In honor of Black Wednesday, why not commit to only ingesting foods and beverages that are black in some way? Sound unappetizing? That’s where you’re wrong. Fresco 21 in Rosemont has created a tantalizing Fettuccine con Fungi (wild mushrooms with fresh black truffles, marsala, thyme, and cream; $21). You can wash it down with one of the featured “black” cocktails, like the $10 Blacklisted, a Black Russian for $9, or a traditional Black and Tan. Fresco 21, 5300 North River Road, (847)447-4275, dinner service begins at 5pm, closes at 2am.
If binge drinking and loud music isn’t your Black Wednesday forte, perhaps French cuisine, a bottle of wine, and a warm atmosphere will suffice. LM Bistro is offering a wine special with a twist. For $15, guests pick either red or white and one of fifty surprise bottles of wines will appear for their enjoyment. LM Bistro, 111 West Huron, (312)202-9900 , special from 5pm-11pm.
One of the best things about fall is the flavors and smells synonymous with the last harvest of the year. Give your senses up to Luxbar’s array of specialty cocktails available on Black Wednesday and the Friday after Thanksgiving. The list includes the Pumpkin Spice Martini (Absolut vodka, Amarula liquor and housemade pumpkin spice syrup; $12), Local Cider Martini (Lairds Straight Apple Brandy, Klug Farms cider, Burton Maplewood Farms maple syrup, and a touch of lemon; $12), and Cinnamon Fig Sidecar (Hennessy VSOP, Grand Marnier, mission fig, a touch of fresh sour; $12). Luxbar, 18 East Bellevue Place, (312) 642-3400, 11am-2am.
Pioneer Tavern Group Blackout Wednesday Trolley Crawl
Get your drunk ass around town courtesy of Pioneer Tavern Group. A free trolley running from 7pm to midnight will make stops every thirty minutes at Frontier in Noble Square, Lottie’s in Bucktown, and The Pony in Lakeview. The trolley will be stocked with samples of Heineken, Avion and Malibu cocktails. Each location offers a different special event (speakeasy party at Frontier, karaoke at Lottie’s and a honkytonk band at The Pony) and offer drink specials $5 and under. To guarantee a spot on the trolley, sign up at the bar or email freetrolley@
Dance your heart out before you stuff your face. At Spy Bar, the bass won’t stop bumping till the wee hours of the morning. The internationally revered DJ duo Kenny Glasgow and Jonny White, now operating under the name Art Department, will join Garrett B for a long, sweaty night of house and techno hits. Save a couple bucks with the early bird special by ordering your tickets in advance at ClubTix.com.
Spy Bar, 646 North Franklin, (312)337-2191, 10pm-4am, $10/$15 online, $20 at the door, 21+.
Check out some up and coming local talent in Wicker Park at Taxim. Rapper and producer Greater Than Wealth (GTW for short) will perform his latest jazzy synth cuts. Local DJ Benfang will spin a set of his lounge-meets-dubstep dance grooves. Radio DJ, Dj-Eves, from 88.7’s the Hip Hop Project will really get it hype with everyone’s favorite jams. That includes Soul Phonetics, aficionados of house, jazz, and all flavors of Afrobeat. Taxim, 1558 North Milwaukee, (773) 252-1558, 10pm-2am, $5 cover, 21+.
—Compiled by Jessica Burg